After the thick haze of excess, we arrived back to Chicago to our airport hotel for some much needed rest and relaxation. This relaxation was required not just due to the late nights and glitz of Vegas, but more so due to our impending drive ahead of us. Known for not much in the way of tourist sites, we had planned to attack the American prairies head on, 1100kms at a time.

Kam and I have managed the 1200km drive between Adelaide and Canberra on numerous occasions and we commenced our usual long haul routine. We had an early night and woke up re-energised, had hearty breakfast, filled the thermos, made the sandwiches and got ourselves locked and loaded for long haul – American style. We had visions of the Hay Plains as we set off from Chicago. Our trip would take in 4 states with lots of varied countryside in just one day of driving.

Our drive took us:

• From Illinois, unfortunately avoiding Joliet (where Jake was imprisoned in the Blues Brothers)
• Into Wisconsin, my only solace was in yelling out “Hello Wisconsin” every time I saw a local licence plate.
• Over the mighty Mississippi into Minnesota.
• Right into South Dakota, Little House on the Prairie territory

Driving along 1,100 miles of road you get to see quite a few billboards advertising a variety of things. One that kept popping at quite regular intervals was the Mitchell Corn Palace, apparently the world’s only palace made “entirely” out of corn. Apparently bulls#!t! The building was a concrete gymnasium (actually had a game of volleyball on at the time) with a mosaic facade made from different colour corn. It was really not worth the price of admission, and that’s saying something cost it was FREE! Billboards – 1, K&D – 0

Next billboard which had an effect on us commercial junkies was to a place called the Woodhouse Steak House, in which we polished off some ribs, very nice steaks. Highlight was the $6 margaritas and the all you can eat peanuts while you waited for your table. Billboards – 1, K&D – 1.

But the ultimate Billboard stop was still to come. The signs had been tempting us for miles, we saw the first billboard 120 miles out and they kept coming at 20 and then 10 miles intervals. The magic of over an hour of steady advertising succeeded in getting us into the famous (we say famous, because like us, everyone stops off there), Wall Drug! Wall Drug is an institution along this highway, it used to be a small mom and pop store that was doing tough, and even tougher once they decided to deviate the highway past their store. In order to alleviate this, their son thought it would be a good idea to offer free water to all drivers to bring the punters in. And, in order to let them know, he painted a bunch of signs which were placed on the highway. Before he returned from placing the signs, the shop already had their first customers, and it hasn’t stopped since. Now with more elaborate signs, and still serving 5c coffees and free water, the place was MASSIVE, selling anything you could want from real cowboy chaps to pain killers. Very weird, and quirky, and a bit of fun! Billboards – 1, K&D – 2

We are proud to have one the Battle of the Billboards J

The next day we ventured to the Badlands National Park. The landscape is very Country and Westerns with the Prairies giving way to some very dramatic soil erosion. It kinda looked to me a lot what I imagine Mars to look like. It was pretty amazing to see such dramatic and colourful formations burst from the plain flat ground of the prairies. We walked our way through the area and took heaps of photos and left pleasantly awed by the amazing landscape.

Next stop was a keystone American tourist hotspot, Mt Rushmore, or as I like to call it, “big heads that rock”. One of those iconic tourist hotspots that you are a little hesitant to visit because, lets by honest, most things in America are billed as amazing (I will remind you of the International Lobster Festival fiasco 😉 ). However, I was pretty damn impressed with not only scale but also the workmanship of the sculptures. So big, and so well defined. It is cool for the sculptors to be able to create this wonderful work of art out of a side of a mountain. Great to see and a good stop-off. The free admission was good, but the $10 parking was lame, we spent about 20 minutes there taking our snaps and then we hit the road. Just around the corner we hit Custer State Park with intentions to camp the night in the park. Unfortunately we were not alone, and every single plot in the 5 or 6 campsites within the park were taken. We would leave the park until tomorrow.

That night we found a campsite just out of the park, and settled down to a lovely dinner of campfire cooked Bison burgers. To add the extra manliness to the whole experience, we even used our Chevy’s engine block to warm up the burgers while we were waiting… Grrrr!

Next morning couldn’t have been better. Before going to sleep, we forgot to set our alarm, with luck it ended up not being an issue. It seems that the State park had its own alarm system, Bison. The most amazing sound that Kam and I have heard was being woken to the sounds of Bison calling. So haunting, and ancient, it kind of made you feel like a caveman back in pre-historic times. If Bison weren’t enough, the wolves then started joining in. The most amazing wake-up call I will ever have!

Now wide awake (much earlier than we were accustomed to – 7:00am), we showered, packed up and hit Custer State Park. Within 10 minutes of entering the park, we had already seen our first set of brake lights (a sure sign that wildlife was about), and wildlife there was! As we scaled the rise it appeared to us, a huge herd of Bison, close to 800 of them. We pulled to the side of the road, and with no fear whatsoever, the Bison got closer, and closer, even getting so close that I was worried for our car my wife. The Bison took to the road, and we were soon surrounded on all sides by the massive beasts.

Not content with Bison, we continued around the park spotting Pronghorns, Prairie Dogs, Deer, and wild Donkeys. The morning was so brilliant for seeing wildlife, we forgot we were in a state park, and not a safari park! Still in Custer Park, we went kayaking on Sylvan Lake, soaking up the glorious sun. We were pretty amazed that this park wasn’t in fact a National Park, as it was packed full of wildlife, beautiful lakes, amazing facilities, and the largest population of Bison in the US. We then found out that the only reason the park wasn’t National, was the state got in there first, nice work South Dakota!

With the afternoon closing in we drove to Deadwood, the real life western town, famed for recent TV show (of the same name), and celebrities such as Wild Bill Hickok and Calamity Jane. The town was kitsch, but in a kinda classy way. We stopped in at the pub that Bill Hickok was killed in, knocked back a pint, polished off a bison and elk burger, and learnt about the Dead Man’s Hand (the actual hand that Hickok held when he was killed). On our way back to the car we happened upon Kevin Costner’s pub, we didn’t see him working behind the bar to help subsidise his failing acting career, however, he had managed to adorn the cowboy themed pub with plenty of posters of his movies in case we had forgotten that he was once a famous movie star.

An amazing and jammed packed day was rounded off with a slight detour to America’s first national monument, Devils Tower. We couldn’t have seen it at a better time, with the sunset hitting the side, making the jelly-mould-like formation glow above the treetops (it’s actually the ‘lava plug’ of an old volcano). On our way pack to the main highway we were then startled by some deer (with antlers!!) as they safely jumped in front of our car. An amazing end to an amazing day, it would take a lot to beat this one. But, who knows, tomorrow we hit Yellowstone, anything could happen.